Where can you always find money?

In the dictionary!

Did ya think I was going to reveal some secret money making discovery? Sorry, unfortunately I have no such wisdom to pass along. I just thought it would make a great attention grabbing title, relevant to my story. If you've made it this far then I guess it worked. lol

After many many years of Matt working 1 1/2 jobs, leaving the house about 6:30 am and not getting home till 6:00 pm, 5 days a week, we made the decision to let the 1/2 time position go in the interest of having him more "available" to our family. He's always completely exhausted by the time he gets back to us in the evenings and the weekends are spent recouping and recharging for the next long haul, not leaving much mental or physical energy for the needs of our young and active family. It's been a decision a long time in the making, and even though decisions affecting the reduction in available funds are always difficult ones we feel it was absolutely the right one.

The biggest quandary our new financial paradigm creates for our family is the money for private education is not going to be available next year. That's a big problem for us because we're really not comfortable with the class size, curriculum content, and achievement test focus of the public school system which really only leaves us with the option of homeschooling. While I'm entirely willing to take this road if we feel it's the right one for our family, it's not really something I'm chomping at the bits to do.

I do make a bit of money at the various and sundry jobs I keep myself busy with, but it's never been anything much that we count on for day to day living. They are more of the self funding variety. Teaching Zumba basically covers the cost of my licensing fees and allows me to get my exercise for free, no gym membership required. Neher Confection is still at the point that any "profit" needs to go back into the business to keep the growth chart moving in the upward direction. Now, the money I make teaching Bradley could possibly be enough to cover tuition costs if I had enough couples throughout the year, but it's not something we feel we could rely on enough to write checks against for a whole school year. We are not now and never have been a "write it in faith" kind of family. To us, that's just presuming on the future and asking for trouble and embarrassment. So, we have been uncomfortably parked at the intersection of "homeschool" & "If enough Bradley money comes in". I'm a planner, and not so great with the "be still and know I am God" stuff. So, every time I start to feel my chest twist up from the what-ifs I take a deep breath and whisper a weak but heartfelt prayer,

"I trust you Lord, no matter what...no matter what."

I was supposed to have a Bradley class start 2 weeks ago and had several couples interested. It looked like it was a certainty, and I was feeling very hopeful about using that money for next years schooling.

And then it all fell through.

People's schedules weren't meshing, childcare wasn't working, their money had become unavailable, etc, and I had to cancel the class. I was a little more than distraught. Once again my heart faintly uttered a whisper,

"...no matter what."

I tried to stay in that place. That place of rest. That place of not knowing and being ok. That place of trust.

And then a few days later...the class is back on again.

When I hung up the phone with couple #3 this afternoon I looked up to the ceiling, closed my eyes and whispered a different heart prayer, with soft tears rolling off my lashes,

"thank you.....thank you"

The amount of this class alone will not be enough, but this is how my God interacts with me, softly, gently, not necessarily exactly what I'm asking for, but always in the direction of stronger faith. As I whispered to Him he responded in kind, and I heard His voice in the wind, not the earthquake.

"Lord I believe, help my unbelief, and no matter what....I trust you."

A Loss and a Lesson

I lost a wedding. 

I lost a wedding this weekend because I was honest with them. 

I lost a wedding this weekend because I was honest with them that I didn't have the right skill set to give them what they wanted...

so they found someone who could.

I HATE loosing. The older I get the more I realize how very competitive I am about just about anything I do, and this has been no exception. The very thought of loss makes me want to snarl and growl and snap at myself for not making the grade.

My head knows that you can't really loose something you never had in the first place, there had been no contract agreement made. However, my heart refuses to hear it. Honesty is the best policy for sure, and I have never attempted the sugar art they were requesting and therefore was not certain that I could deliver to their expectations. They were not interested in the alternatives I offered and took their business elsewhere. It was the right thing to do, for both parties, but it doesn't make it suck any less for the loosing side.

While my competitiveness may occasionally fall on the side of my negative personality traits, I do tend to adapt very quickly in most cases to any negative stimulus. If something's not working I usually don't hesitate to adjust my plan of action accordingly. I've missed out on some business because people don't want to drive all the way out to Kasson. I'm working on Rochester pick up location. I lost another wedding because I wasn't offering delivery. I now offer delivery. I lost this wedding because I wasn't offering gumpaste flowers. I'm now on a gumpaste flower learning quest. 

The next day, I learned how to make a rose. My technique still needs a bit of work but I'm very happy with how it turned out none the less.

 Yesterday I learned how to make a carnation. Took me 3 tries, but I finally nailed it.

 Today I did a cala lilly. I can't wait to try these in some other colors.

So far so good I'd say! My plan is 1 new flower a day till I have a good sized base I feel I can offer on Neher Confection's products. I don't really have a certain # of flowers I would like to have available, but I do want a good variety. So, ultimately I'm trying to turn my losses into my future clients' gain which is probably the best thing to do when you loose anyway. I guess a few negatives really CAN make a positive!

25 to Life

I'm tired of stubbing my toe on Mr. Potato Head's mad scientist lab shoes. I'm tired of tripping on Darth Vader's light saber. I'm tired of peeling stick by # stickers off the bottom of my socks, and I'm tired of sounding like a broken record telling the kiddos to put things away before they get something else out. Their imaginations move to fast for me to keep up with everything they've got going on in their little worlds' of make believe. SO,  I've re-instituted toy jail in our house today. 

We've done this in the past where if I asked you to put something away and it doesn't happen in a timely fashion then the item gets put in "jail" and you have to do a chore to pay for it's bail. This method got some things off the floor, but the kids would forget about the items and never ask to buy them back. So, the toy jail box would just keep getting more full and more full. Plus, the kids are saving the chore money they make to replace a dress up box they broke a few months back by pulling out the drawers and using them for stairs. At 5 cents a chore it is taking a LONG time to reach the $25 replacement value, but that's neither here nor there.

So, this go around I think the toys will be confiscated for a 2 week time period and then released back into the general population. During their time of incarceration we will continue to do toy jail drills (timer is set for 10 minutes in a room of mom's choice, whenever mom sees fit, and anything that is not put away when the timer goes off will be thrown into the slammer), and eventually we will either have better management of toys or we will be working the toys into a rotation system which isn't a bad option either from where I stand.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go put today's haul into lock down.